Stop Thanking Us for Our Service — Do This Instead
- Rich Washburn
- May 26
- 2 min read
Every year it bugs me a little more. Not just on Memorial Day—honestly, it happens all year. Someone finds out I served, and suddenly the conversation slams to a halt. "Oh... I didn’t know. Well, thank you for your service." Cue the awkward silence.
Look, I get it. It’s meant with respect. And I am proud of my service—proud enough that I’d do it again if I got the call. But these days, “thank you for your service” feels less like connection and more like a reflex. A polite pause that sidetracks real conversations. It turns moments about life, work, or just being human into something else—something shallow. And for a lot of us vets, that’s a door we don’t always want to open… again.
Here’s the thing: most veterans I know aren’t looking for thanks. We’re wired differently. We didn’t serve to be thanked—we served because we felt called to protect, to serve, to be part of something bigger than ourselves. And when we came home, we brought that same mindset with us.
So if you really want to thank us, stop saying it—and start showing it:
Help a vet. Not by asking how—just do it. Mow a lawn. Offer a ride. Drop off a meal.
Talk to a vet. Ask how they’re doing. Not about combat, not about cool gear or missions. Ask about their friends. Ask who they know that could use a hand.
Support their mission. Veterans are wired to help others—so help them help someone else. That’s how we’re built. That’s how we got through.
And while you’re at it, remember this: Memorial Day isn’t just about military service. It’s about sacrifice. It’s about honoring every man and woman who gave their lives for their country and community—soldiers, cops, firefighters, medics. Public servants. People who ran toward danger when others ran away.
You really want to thank us?
Join us. Be of service. Pick up the torch.That’s how you show gratitude.
Because when we see someone out there helping others—not for attention, not for credit, just because it’s right—we know we’re not alone. We know the mission continues. And honestly? That means a hell of a lot more than any thank you ever could.
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